Saturday, January 22, 2011

My First ICLW and a Sad Saturday :(

Yay! My first ICLW! Welcome to my blog. I'm Aub, an almost 30 something and DH will be 31 soon.  We have been TTC #3 since 2010.We were not even considered infertile by our RE (we haven't been trying yet for a year) but I started seeing him because my cycles were irregular and ovulation was not always predictable.  I just completed a perfectly timed Femara cycle this month and during it all, we found out through a s/a that DH tested positive for two antisperm antibodies.  We have been been diagnosed with MF IF and are starting down the path of IVF with ICSI.  Pretty heavy diagnosis to swallow..

Today is a sad Saturday for me. My mom, who has been visiting from West Virginia for the week, is leaving today.  We just moved from the Pittsburgh, PA area to Oklahoma City, OK five months ago and I have been so very homesick for my parents and the mountains of West Virginia.  I went back for a brief visit in November and was planning on going back with my two sons in March for spring break, but I'll be in my TWW from my ET and I think Dr. Awesome RE would heavily discourage me from traveling when I'm supposed to be giving my embies a fair shot at implanting.

Now, I'm not a selfish brat. I know what's important and what is the right thing to do. We are trying to complete our family via some of the most invasive and expensive means possible and it would be silly stupid to risk it all just to go home and visit my family and friends.  I've been debating on putting off the whole IVF cycle until I go home, see everyone that I miss, recharge, reboot, re-Aub.  Honestly, I don't know what to do.  I have my birth control pills, AF is due today.  IVF class is scheduled for Tuesday at 4.  I will need to make my appointment for Monday or Wednesday for my u/s and mapping. I feel bad because the wheels have been set in motion for IVF NOW.  Would it be so bad if I just waited? Could I just wait?

Ugh. Sorry to be such a drama queen.

Here's a song that I like.  It suits my mood today, feeling "Cuckoo":)

Cuckoo by Lissie


  1. I say get pregnant then come home and we can (hopefully) be two annoying pregnant ladies lunching! I'm sorry mama is leaving today :( But you guys had a really nice, long visit, and I'm sure it was just what you needed after a shitty month.


  2. *hugs* I say go on with IVF. When I waited to do it, I built up so many nerves and psyched myself out about it. Go for it. Praying for you.

  3. Im sorry your mom is leaving. I understand your conflict. It may help to go home but then youll be wondering what ifs about ivf. Its a hard decision. Hugs.

  4. Hi! I'm here for ICLW - welcome to the fun! Good luck with your decision, and I'm sorry that you've been homesick. -ICLW #85

  5. Thanks for stopping by and saying hi. I really like the look of your blog, such a pretty header.

    I'm so sorry to hear you guys have joined the Male issues club. We are still pretty new to it ourselves but there are moments when its a rough go. I hope your next steps bring you much closer to the best end result. I'll be reading along.

  6. Thanks, Lindsay! Your blog is really pretty, too. Male issues are no fun at all. :( I hope that everything works out the best for you, too!

  7. *Waves*

    Hi! I'm julia from!

    I, too, hate those photos. You know what's worse? People who complain during their pregnancy... I also had a friend publicly weighing the odds of m/c if she had some sushi. WAIT 5 MORE MONTHS!! SHEESH!